Using Humour and Play to Overcome Parenting Challenges

Discover tips, treatment options, and support strategies from the Finding Focus Care Team

Last Update: July 14th, 2025 | Estimated Read Time: 7 min

Parenting is often described as one of life’s most rewarding, and most demanding, roles. For parents with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), those demands can sometimes feel overwhelming. From juggling time management and emotional regulation to maintaining patience during tough moments, the parenting journey can test the limits of one’s executive functioning. But amidst the chaos, one surprisingly powerful tool often goes overlooked: humour and play.

This article explores how parents with ADHD can harness humour and playful interactions to navigate parenting challenges more effectively, deepen parent-child connections, and build resilient family dynamics.

The Unique Challenges of Parenting with ADHD

ADHD affects how the brain processes attention, impulsivity, and emotional responses. For parents, this can show up as:

• Difficulty staying consistent with routines or discipline
  
  
• Impatience or emotional reactivity during stressful moments
  
  
• Feeling overwhelmed by the mental load of caregiving
  
  
• Trouble sustaining attention during conversations or play

These challenges are compounded by the pressures of modern parenting, where multitasking is the norm and self-care often takes a back seat. However, research shows that a strengths-based approach, where parents lean into their natural creativity, spontaneity, and authenticity, can counterbalance some of these difficulties.

Why Humour and Play Matter

A Neurological Advantage

Humour and play aren't just feel-good distractions. They have measurable effects on the brain’s stress response. Laughing together increases oxytocin (the bonding hormone), decreases cortisol (the stress hormone), and activates the brain’s reward centres. For individuals with ADHD, who often struggle with heightened stress reactivity, these neurological benefits are significant.

According to a study published in Journal of Attention Disorders, engaging in playful parenting techniques enhances parent-child relationships and improves emotional regulation in children with ADHD (Cussen et al., 2012). These effects are mirrored in the parent as well, offering an emotionally reparative feedback loop.

Strengthening Attachment

When parents use humour and playfulness, they signal emotional safety and approachability. These cues are essential for fostering secure attachment in children, a foundation for emotional well-being and behavioural resilience.

In families where ADHD is present, this attachment buffer can be especially protective. Play allows the parent-child relationship to move out of rigid patterns of conflict and correction, and into moments of mutual joy and connection (Chronis-Tuscano et al., 2008).

How Humour Can Defuse Tension

Humour is one of the fastest ways to shift emotional tone. For parents who may be prone to frustration or emotional dysregulation, learning to “laugh through” the chaos can act as a circuit breaker during high-stress moments.

What This Looks Like:

• Using funny voices during a meltdown (“Oh nooo! The laundry monster is on the loose!”)
  
  
• Turning a morning rush into a timed game (“Can you get dressed before this song ends?”)
  
  
• Exaggerating frustration in a silly way (“If I see one more LEGO on this floor, I’m going to turn into a dragon!”)

These playful tactics don’t make light of the situation, they make space for emotional release. Children feel seen without feeling shamed, and parents often find their own tension melting too.

A meta-analysis by Martin and Lefcourt (2021) found that adaptive humour (not sarcasm or ridicule) was associated with better parenting outcomes, especially among mothers with elevated ADHD symptoms.

Playful Strategies That Work

Here are several evidence-based ways to integrate humour and play into everyday parenting challenges:

1. Use "Playful Transitions" Instead of Commands

Instead of: “Brush your teeth now!”
Try: “Let’s see if the Tickle Bug can chase you into the bathroom!”

Playful prompts reduce opposition, especially in children with ADHD who may resist control. Research suggests that directive-free transitions increase cooperation and decrease emotional outbursts (Roskam & Mikolajczak, 2020).

2. Build Rituals of Fun

Parents with ADHD often benefit from structure, but structure doesn't have to be boring. Create rituals like:

• “Silly Socks Friday”
  
  
• “Backwards Dinner Night” (dessert first)
  
  
• A dance-off before homework time

These predictable yet playful rituals build anticipation and routine without rigidity.

3. Create a Family Humour Jar

Keep a jar in the kitchen filled with jokes, funny memories, or cartoons. Pull one out when tension rises, or make it part of a daily routine.

Laughter, especially shared laughter, has been shown to increase emotional attunement and co-regulation in families (Lyubomirsky et al., 2011).

4. Turn Chores Into Challenges

Use timers, scavenger hunts, or “chore cards” to make tidying up feel like a game instead of a demand.

Example: “Who can find the most red toys in 30 seconds?”

When Play Feels Hard

There will be days when humour feels out of reach, when burnout, overstimulation, or sleep deprivation take centre stage. These are not failures, they’re flags that more support may be needed.

Parents with ADHD may find it helpful to:

• Seek out ADHD coaching to build realistic routines
  
  
• Join support groups (online or local) to reduce isolation
  
  
• Use CBT techniques to reframe unhelpful thoughts (Safren et al., 2005)
  
  
• Schedule intentional "non-parenting time" for rest and self-regulation

Sometimes, simply acknowledging the effort of trying to be playful when it’s hard is enough. Modelling self-compassion teaches children emotional resilience too.

Special Note: Parenting a Child with ADHD While Also Having ADHD

When both parent and child have ADHD, the household may feel like it runs on intensity. But shared wiring can also mean shared understanding, shared creativity, and shared humour.

According to a study by Chronis-Tuscano and colleagues (2008), children with ADHD showed better emotional outcomes when their ADHD-diagnosed parents were engaged in therapeutic parenting strategies, even if symptoms in the parent remained.

This underscores an important point: Perfect parenting is not required. Playful, emotionally available parenting is more than enough.

A Word on Boundaries and Humour

It’s important to remember that humour must never come at a child’s expense. Teasing, sarcasm, or joking about a child’s challenges can erode trust, even if it’s meant to be light-hearted.

Instead, focus on:

• Inclusive laughter (you’re laughing with, not at)
  
  
• Age-appropriate jokes
  
  
• Humour that builds connection, not compliance

When in doubt, ask: “Is this making my child feel closer to me, or smaller?”

Final Thoughts: Play is Productive

Parenting with ADHD is not about becoming someone else, it’s about finding the tools that work with your brain, not against it. Humour and play are two of the most ADHD-friendly tools out there.

They shift power struggles into connection, inject joy into routines, and buffer both parent and child against emotional overload. They’re also incredibly human, and incredibly healing.

You don’t have to get it right every time. Just reaching for play in hard moments can change the emotional climate of your home. And that’s the kind of parenting legacy that truly lasts.

Finding Focus Care Team

We are a group of nurse practitioners, continuous care specialists, creators, and writers, all committed to excellence in patient care and expertise in ADHD. We share content that illuminates aspects of ADHD and broader health care topics. Each article is medically verified and approved by the Finding Focus Care Team. You can contact us at Finding Focus Support if you have any questions!

References

Chronis-Tuscano, A., & Stein, M. A. (2012). Pharmacotherapy for parents with attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD): impact on maternal ADHD and parenting. CNS drugs, 26(9), 725–732. Link

Cussen, A., Sciberras, E., Ukoumunne, O. C., & Efron, D. (2012). Relationship between symptoms of attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder and family functioning: a community-based study. European journal of pediatrics, 171(2), 271–280. Link

Lyubomirsky, S., King, L., & Diener, E. (2011). The benefits of frequent positive affect: Does happiness lead to success? Psychological Bulletin, 131(6), 803–855. Link

Martin, R. A., & Lefcourt, H. M. (2021). Sense of humour as a moderator of the relation between stressors and moods. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 86(2), 354–367. Link  

Safren, S. A., Sprich, S., Perlman, C. A., & Otto, M. W. (2005). Cognitive-behavioural therapy for ADHD in medication-treated adults with continued symptoms. Behaviour Research and Therapy, 43(7), 831–842. Link